Auckland Contemplations

The grass rustled under my swift footstep. There was no need to hurry, but I was eager. I wanted to know. I wanted some kind of answer. The SHEEP tour is a Spiritual journey. I know it! 

The trees of the park were whispering to each other, it seemed, as I strode beneath them. The day was somewhat dimly lit, and the park wasn’t as alive as I had always known it to be. But I barely gave a passing thought to that. My mind was intent on contemplating something else: the meaning of the SHEEP tour. At least, what it meant to me and my life journey. What am I here in Auckland to discover? Why the tour .. why now?  Eyes fastened ahead, I could see the place I was so keen on visiting. Spiritual insight… It must be, I thought confidently, quickening my pace again. A pilgrimage to Dunedin.

There were a number of places I wanted to visit during my two-week window in Auckland. But this stood above them all. Snug in the grand park known as One Tree Hill, it was a cluster of trees within which I had my first spiritual experience, after I began reading The Power of Now by Eckharte Tolle. I extended my appreciation outwardly, to encompass the vicinity - the trees and their calm stature, the grasses wishing for the rain. “This is where it all began,” I said wonderingly, barely noticing that I had spoken out loud. I stood for a moment, almost expectant, as if that same spiritual experience would re-kindle in this moment, and give me answers. 

I sat. And I waited. But nothing happened. No ‘great insight’ arose from my thoughts. Nothing miraculous occurred. The clouds continued their slow-tumble across the sky. 

And then, I heard the noise.

Blip 

It was my phone, buzzing in my pocket. I pulled it to my face. A facebook message, from Tommy.

“Practice tonight”

— — —

I scooped up Tommy from his house in the Emerald Wagon, and we darted just up to road to Toby’s house. We sauntered into his crib with our instruments. 

Toby’s face lit up the moment we entered. “Hey what’s up!” He said, tossing his laptop aside and coming up to greet us with enthusiasm. “Man, it’s so good to see you guys!” His hair was longer and curlier, and a moustache arched over his upper lip. “Great to see you too!” Tommy and I chimed over each other, embracing Toby before we made ourselves comfortable in his room - SHEEP’s practice space. 

We conversed for some time. He told us about recent happenings in his life, and we told him about the drive up, about Dunedin and Wellington, and some tour admin. We began setting up our instruments almost by pure instinct, joking about random shenanigans as we plugged in leads and repositioned things. I already felt the energy of the trio. I sensed it there, waiting not-so-patiently to be unleashed through our instruments and our music like a steaming geyser.

It felt good to sit upon my Korg R3 again. I never used it outside of SHEEP, and yet it was a ripper of a Synth. The only problem was that the power chord was finicky, and only brought power if it was lodged in the right position. It was a serious issue back when SHEEP first started gigging, and it never got solved. Trouble, I thought grimly. A wad of tape firmly wrapped around it did the trick, if I was lucky. “Got any tape?” I asked Toby, and went to rummage behind his couch where he suspected it might be. I found it, and bandaged up the chord and synth.

Toby was already drumming, warming up. I began fiddling around with the settings, recalling the tones I used, and the effects that brought character to the bass. Tommy knelt before his pedals, flicking switches and strumming his guitar. Looking satisfied, he stood. “Lets just play through all the songs,” he said. The idle chatter is done.. Now the real conversation begins. I could feel the untamed force of SHEEP rattling within me; my third of the share, eager to surge through my fingers and into the bass. I knew the other two would be feeling the same. 

And then we began. Toby’s fast paced drumming exploded into the room like fireworks, and my rumbling bass organised it, helped direct it towards Tommy. He took it by the neck and brought alive the music, the final third of SHEEP: frisky guitar playing and singing (screaming). For an hour we practiced, shocked at how good it sounded. It was a fact of SHEEP - the spirit never died, and it only got more fervent with time. We hadn’t lived as one unit in the same city for 2 years, and yet we had gotten better… We had improved. "Bloody hell! We could start the tour tomorrow at this rate.."

SHEEP was re-united. 

— — — 

Underneath the splendid skies, Auckland harbour glistened like the belly of a paua shell. Wind streamed through my hair and battered my face, filling me with aliveness. It tastes so refreshing, I thought. Whenever I was aboard a ferry, I was outside, riding the wind.

In the evenings, SHEEP happened. But the day time was my own affair, and I still had some puzzling to do. On a whim, I decided to catch the bus into the town, and then catch the ferry over to Rangitoto Island, to contemplate and internalise the journey in another one of my favourite Auckland spots. I watched as the green hulk of an island, rising confidently out of the ocean, got bigger, began filling my entire vision. Soon, it loomed above, green and black, and slightly mysterious.

Busy workers tossed life-sized ropes to the wooden pier, and began tying them up. ‘Make sure you are back here at the terminal by…’ the Ferry-man’s voice addressed through the speakers. I was only half-listening, intent on searching the island with my eyes. I tried to remember the last time I stepped foot on Rangitoto. It must be at least 5 years… The place fascinated me. ‘And we hope you enjoy your day on Rangitoto,’ the voice finished. Ropes were fastened, and the plank laid. I was the first across.

The path I chose skirted along the shore. There was not a single grain of sand. Rocks ruled these shores - black as night they were, and piled all over each other like mounds of charcoal. Even the shrubbery was wary, keeping a distance. For a moment on the ferry, I wondered why I chose Rangitoto that day. But now I saw why. This is a very interesting place for contemplation. As I started down the trail, I also started down a trail of thoughts.

I thought about my wider journey, as it were. It was 3 years since I had left Auckland on my big voyage to Queenstown. Much had transpired since then. My adventure in the mountains lead to personal revelation - to the discovery of my life purpose, and to what I really wanted to say with my life and my creative pursuits. But SHEEP existed before all that, and the connection never died. It took me to Dunedin - Why Dunedin?? - where I was supposedly going to meet a spiritual mentor, and advance spiritually. It took me to that very moment, hiking on Rangitoto Island through the sticky summer air. And it was yet to take me and my good friends on this epic journey - this pilgrimage - down New Zealand, playing music. What’s behind all of this?

The track along the shore abruptly ended, and the path upward beckoned. I stopped to slap on sunblock and drink water, admiring the view while I did it. Auckland city stood proudly between the sea and the sky. The views will be better at the top, I told myself, heading up the trail. It took me higher, and deeper into the bush.

Along the way, my thoughts took an interesting turn that I never quite expected, after watching my shoes as they flurried across the gravel track. I thought about Kung Fu, which I used to practice as a kid. Man, it was quite a big part of my life. Why did I ever stop? I went to China! It was like a levee broke in my pool of memories. So many things came flooding back. Memories from my trip to China carried me up the volcano.

Before I knew it, I had made it to the top of Rangitoto. Auckland stretched out, my original home, where the journey all began. Strangely, it wasn’t the meaning of the SHEEP tour that swayed my mind. It was remembering my affinity for ancient Chinese culture, and the role it had played on my life journey.

— — — 

“I went to Rangitoto today,” I told the guys. “Ah cool,” Toby responded, twirling his hair. “What did you do there?” I looked up at him, sitting atop his drum kit. “Just went for a walk. It was a nice day…” Too hard to explain. Tommy cut through our idle chatter with distorted guitar and a mischievous face. He strummed again. And again. Faster and faster, until eventually he was throwing himself hard and fast into an epic guitar solo. Toby and I both knew in that moment that it was time to begin, so we launched into the jam.

That night, we focused on practicing the songs that needed work. Rehearsal. We had 6 gigs coming up, and just the thought of it excited me. I can’t wait to perform! Playing a gig was one of my all-time favourite activities. And we had 6 shows, back to back, ahead of us: Auckland (2 shows), Tauranga, Wellington, Queenstown, and Dunedin. I wondered if the shows would get progressively more intense, or less intense. Would we start the tour with a bang? Or end with a bang? Would we get so fed up with each other, cramped together in the Emerald Wagon like sardines, that our music would be heated and even more powerful? I looked up at Tommy and Toby. Could happen.. I almost laughed. 

We were practicing our single, ‘The Government can’t take my Benny’, when I felt a throb from my neck. Oh shit! It was the boil on my neck, yelling at me, reminding me that it existed, reminding me that it’s sole purpose was to cause me grief. I switched what I was playing on my synth to my left hand, and felt the boil. It was hot…

We practiced until even the night itself sighed at our racket. The neighbours must be fuming! It didn’t matter. We were starting to sound really tight.

— — —

The following evening, my pace was quick. Quicker than Toby’s drumming, even.

Man, I can’t believe it's on tonight… of all nights! My black Feiyues were a blur - they took me places faster than any other shoe. No wonder, I mused. Kung Fu shoes would… I may have stopped practicing Kung Fu, but I never stopped wearing the shoes. Unless they had holes in the bottom, and it was a rainy day.

Damn if I miss the performance… I better hurry. I started jogging down the Mt Eden streets. The one night Tommy isn’t keen to practice, and this is on… I still couldn’t wrap my head around the coincidence of it. One day I remember all about being a disciple of Kung Fu, travelling to China to compete, and the very next day is… 

I stopped abruptly, eyes widening. It is really there… I thought, incredulous. The Auckland Domain was bubbling with life, a slow river of people flowing through the wide gates. What lay beyond was nothing short of magical. “The Chinese Lantern Festival..” 

I merged with the river of people, and was carried deep into the Festival. Lanterns hummed in the trees, emanating warmth. Kids ran around, laughing and playing. Structures of dragons caught my eye, flowing like silk and glowing golden from within, striking a sense of the ancient. A soft twinkling all but kissed my ear, and had me searching in all directions. It was sweet and gorgeous, sailing through the air like a voyage of the royal. Chinese music is so beautiful. Chinese culture… ‘Mesmerised’ comes close to describing how I felt.

But people were everywhere. I need to get out of this crowd, I realised. This thick crowd.. People criss-crossed in all directions - tall people, short people, old folks, young. I chose a direction, and started walking. And then, out through the crowd strode… 

“Coach Guo?!” I blurted, shocked to the core. He stopped mid stride, studying my face. And then surprise took him. “Josha! Wow, you have a beard, so grown up!” I shook his hand vigorously. My Kung Fu coach!! I was so thankful for the influence he had on my life, and I wanted to express my gratitude, but I was too much in shock to see him out of the blue like this. "Good to see you!” was all I managed. The crowd flowed around us, like a river around rocks. Coach looked in a hurry. “We have performance soon,” he said, gesturing. “I must go, I will see you there!” It sounded almost like a command. The next moment, he vanished in the throng of people. I remained, stunned.

It was much too late when I realised I should have walked with him. Damn! The performance must be on soon. I found a map quick, and navigated my way across the park to the ‘Martial Arts Corner’. The ring of people gave it away, and I saw a strong man whirling about with two swords as I made my way to the front. Heck, I know that guy! That's Jun! I sat, thoroughly entertained, as the group I was once apart of performed Wu Shu. Rangiatea, nice! Still practicing, still performing! It seemed all too surreal… The Chinese Lantern Festival buzzed on in the background.

I felt the atmosphere so strongly, that in that moment, I could have sworn I was a Chinese man in my previous life.

— — — 

It was over a cup of tea, snug in my family home, where I made my final contemplation. Wisps of steam wavered in front of my face, and I took a sip. Hot!

I had found the final piece of this puzzle I was trying to figure out. It was a video discussion that, in light of everything that had transpired, deeply intrigued me. It was a video discussion about Taoism, an ancient spiritual faith originating in China.

Every point raised seemed to contextualise or relate to my Auckland contemplations. The idea of following the natural way of life was a philosophy I had been unknowingly following ever since moving to Queenstown. And I had already dubbed the journey, the SHEEP band tour, a spiritual journey. In my pursuit to make sense of it all, I had found this. I had stumbled upon Taoism.

And it resonated! I felt right. It aligned with my childhood, with all those years practicing Kung Fu, with the epic journey to China, with who I was and how I saw the world. I wonder if this ‘spiritual mentor' I am yet to meet in Dunedin at the end of the tour is a Taoist. I took a sip of tea.

If I didn’t fully believe that the SHEEP tour was a ‘pilgrimage’ before the Auckland Contemplations, I sure did now. 

And the first gig is 3 days away!